Money Habits from Parents

MONEY HABITS WE ACQUIRE FROM OUR PARENTS

Let’s get something straight.  I think it is completely healthy for me to judge my parents.  I mean, take my father for instance.  Dude was straight irritable when it came to money.  I mean for Pete’s sake, he always acted like the whole world was on his shoulders.  He acted as if he didn’t perform at a certain level, we would have a major setback for some reason.  Seriously, I would be walking out of my room and he would say something like……Are you not going to turn the lights off, son?

You’re kidding, right?

I would look at my father bewildered.  I mean seriously dad; I am just going to get some Kool-Aid.  I will be right back.  Sometimes I wouldn’t be.  I would have to go make the lemonade. Pink lemonade was always in stock at our house.  2 Packets of lemonade with 2 heaping cups of white sugar in a 2-gallon pitcher.  Lemonade for lunch and dinner and when I am thirsty.  At this point in my life, I don’t know why someone would EVER drink water.  That is crazy.

Back to the point.

My father was smart enough to know that somehow, I would get distracted by the simple act of getting Kool-Aid and would most likely leave my light on, sucking money right out of his wallet.  My father also had a unique way of stressing out about doing his homework during our family time.  I honestly don’t understand why he was stressing so much.  It only took me about 30 minutes to do my homework.

Why is his college so special anyway?

All jokes aside, as you get older, you begin to understand old people a little bit more.  I would say a healthy judgment is a good thing.  I know most people don’t like to be judged, however, I think it is good for my kids to analyze my actions and decide if they want to duplicate what I have done or go the opposite direction and never look back.

Our parents have taught us so much just by their actions. 

They taught us how to handle our emotions.  How to treat our spouses.  Unfortunately, sometimes we feel mistreated by our parents’ actions, and we try to over-compensate for things that were done to us.  One of the most common ways to do this is when we try to make sure our kids never need anything.  If our kid wants a toy or wants to do something fun, we tend to spare no expense in getting them what they want.

If money is a taboo topic in the house, then we try to not talk about it especially if it creates unwanted stress.  And if it was a stressful topic in your house, you may not want to discuss it in front of your children.  I feel that you should discuss cost in front of your children and discuss how you go about making decisions about money.

I’m not stressing about money

In my judgment of my father, I simply don’t want to have to stress about my kids leaving the lights on.  Now by not stress, I mean that I don’t get irate about it.  I will just tell my daughter to go up and turn her light off.  I don’t feel the need to remind her that it was $2.49 worth of lights she just left on.  And let’s be frank, when I am taking my daughters to school, it does look like I am a Light- Treasure-Hunter looking for what lights the women in my life left on.

All kidding aside, my father seemed to be stressed about money all the time.  Don’t get me wrong, it has paid off for him.  It was a different time then too; I am fully aware of all of this.

However, based on what I knew, I worked really hard to put myself in a position where money isn’t an issue.  This usually isn’t fixed by making more money.  It is fixed my managing your expenses and not over-extending yourself.

Don’t be quick to judge

That in mind, don’t be quick to judge your parents on how they manage their money.  Take stock on their entire life with you and see how it has affected your relationship with your spouse, your children, your health and your money.  Ask yourself, ‘do you want to be where they are now’?  The answer may be yes, but sometimes it will be an emphatic ‘HELL NO’.  That doesn’t mean you don’t love them, it means you will use their example, to find a different way – hopefully a better way.

*Investing involves risk. Depending on the types of investments, there may be varying degrees of risk. Investors should be prepared to bear loss, including total loss of principal.